Message from Mom
There’s a place for each one of us in history! Our personal and collective stories, put together, defines the history of the period. So let’s pause and gather our memories. Look at our own footsteps; be they light or heavy. Recall the past, our hopes and dreams and see if we let our destiny float away or we caught each moment, each challenge.
Not so long ago, when life was simpler, when my memories of the past are still vivid, when I can dust away old books and letters, air them by the window, pass the hair dryer to remove the must that has accumulated through years and decades. They have been stored in filing cabinets or scattered in what my dad would call “dead files “.
Only ours have, in time, turned into tiny bodegas, and sorted out by an archivist. The more private ones are kept close to my heart. Those I want to work on, I lay on top of the bed right beside me. In truth, they’ve piled up more memories, not of my own, but memories about others.No one passes alone in life, without those precious others. Who would you and I be without others?
Without them there are no stories to tell.
March 11, 2024
It is here where our mom stops, and while we don’t know what else she would have wanted to say, there is a call for us to keep memories alive. It is these memories that can help sorrow turn to joy. In life, there are seasons. Deep wounds can heal. Broken hearts can mend. Self-reproach can lead to acceptance.
To our dear friends and family who have helped us during our period of profound grief, we thank you.
The time you take to read our issues of Green Monitor honors our mom and her memory.
We hope you’ll enjoy this collection of stories by her family.
In the succeeding pages, Stella recounts a memorable Christmas in 1988, when Kathleen, her daughter, was born. Mylene, Mom’s Christmas baby, brings us back to when Mom was interviewed by a TV reporter. Kathleen, the eldest granddaughter and often referred to as the fifth daughter, puts together a video she compiled, chronicling family life as far back as the early 1970s. From yesteryear, we jump to recent times. Danielle and her kids, Caroline, Edward and Daniel, write about touching anecdotes of their Lola Lina, who believed “a good story comes with a softer heart.”
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A Joyful Mystery
By Danielle Marie Lizares
Mom gave me this Belen in 2002. I display it all year-round
My mom had her devotion to the Rosary. My mom, inspired by Father Peyton, believed that the family that prays together stays together. I thank her for sharing with Caroline and me her devotion.
During COVID, her Araneta cousins started a Rosary group on Zoom. Thanks to modern technology, the cousins could pray together and for each other. Initially, it started once a day at 9 pm. Then, in 2022, during the campaign period for national elections, my mom had the idea of starting a Rosary at 6 pm for the enlightenment of our electorate. When my mom passed away, it was suggested we just do one Rosary a day. I asked the titas if we could keep both. I explained how much I needed the Rosary hour, as it was like having my mom around.
My mom was hardly absent from the Rosary hour. I noticed that if my mom was feeling tired, she would still pray, and almost always, she would feel so energized. My mom also looked forward to the “kwentos” of her cousins after they prayed. They would sometimes reminisce, and at other times, they would discuss politics. My mom found these discussions entertaining. In August 2024, my mom was deeply concerned about the aggression in our West Philippine Sea, to the point that she was inspired to write a prayer. To this day, we recite her prayer for the West Philippine Sea at the end of each Rosary. It is her lasting legacy.
I nearly forgot that the last Rosary we prayed together was hours before her stroke. I recall Tita Angela and I were praying the Joyful Mysteries, and she joined in the middle of the Rosary. I apologized because we had started without her, while Mom was just glad she was able to catch up. Little did I know that was our last Rosary to pray together. I was in the kitchen in my home, and she was in her home. It comforts me to have this memory, which I can hold on to.
Mom had my poems and illustrations made into a Christmas greeting card in 1978
By some stroke of luck, when I was looking at videos on my mom’s cell phone, I discovered a short recording, lasting mere seconds, of my mom asking me if it was time to pray the Rosary. She said, “Nine o’clock na?” And I replied, “It’s 9:02”. I like to think it was our guardian angels who taped this little snippet of our life. It is a souvenir and a reminder of a time and place. To me, it’s quite a mystery who could have recorded our conversation. I may have no way of knowing, and yet I know it is a gift, a grace, and God sent.
It is a joyful mystery.
Editor’s Note
For this issue, I wanted to share how much our mom meant to all of her family. On her birth anniversary, I heard mass and the priest spoke of the first encyclical of Pope Francis entitled ‘Evangelii Gaudium’ or ‘The Joy of the Gospel’. It was then that I realized that, much as my mom was really ahead of her time and a woman who would get the job done, she brought us so much joy. And that’s why it’s been so hard to lose her. The joy she brought was immeasurable.
Looking back on my own early years, my mom would keep the poems and artwork I made in school. She even framed some of them. In 1978, when I was 6, she printed a Christmas card using a short story I wrote on the Nativity as well as a prayer. If not for this, I wouldn’t have this snapshot of my childhood. And now five decades later, I am here compiling stories about my mom. It’s a snapshot of our life together.
Danielle Marie S. Lizares
Pride and Joy
By Caroline S. Lizares
Every year since I can remember, I’ve been going to my village’s annual fiesta. It’s called the Bel Air Pasinaya, which is usually held in April or May. It’s a fiesta where everyone is invited, not just the residents. I would look forward to each fiesta because there are a lot of food booths to choose from and calesa rides to enjoy.Even if the line for the calesas was a bit long, I would wait my turn with my parents and my two brothers. I remember Mang Cornelio, a soft-spoken man, would usually be the one to drive us. Sadly, in recent years, we learned he passed away.
Back in 2016, when I was 12 years old, I took the stage for my very first dance performance. I was grouped with the teens in what’s called a ‘Velada’, which translates to an event held at night. The dance was choreographed by Coach Ching
Pagaduan, who had been part of the Pasinaya for many years.
At first, it was difficult for me to keep up because the dance steps were really complicated. But I tried hard and practiced harder. Coach Ching would tell us our steps didn’t have to be perfect, but he asked us to commit to the practices and not be absent. For 2016, the song that I performed was Francis Magalona’s rap song ‘Man from Manila’. After my first Velada, my Lola Lina said I should get a coach to teach me year-round. It’s good, she insisted as Lola Lina usually does. Fortunately, Coach Ching’s wife, who’s also a dance coach, was available to teach me. So since 2016, Teacher Sheila Lacro-Pagaduan has been my dance coach. I didn’t realize that it’s been almost a decade since I started, with weekly lessons here at home.
Then, during the COVID-19 pandemic, we adapted and conducted lessons on Zoom.
When I danced in the Velada in 2017, for the 60th Anniversary of our village, I received many compliments that I had improved a lot! Aside from having a good coach, I think it also helps that I enjoy dancing. It’s also a good form of exercise, since I’m not really a sports person. When I was a little girl, I wanted to take ballet lessons, but I think hip hop is more my style. Plus, I can choose the songs I want to dance to. These weekly lessons both helped my coordination and boosted my confidence.
Since 2016, I’ve joined a total of seven Pasinayas. My mom and my Lola Lina would watch most of my rehearsals on Sunday afternoons. I count myself lucky that they were there to watch me practice. And when it came to the dress rehearsals, my Lola Lina would go without fail. She would double-check the exact call times with one of the coordinators from the Barangay, Ate Paz Ortega. Once, there was a miscommunication, and I missed a dress rehearsal, so we made sure it wouldn’t happen again. Lola Lina would also be sure to get the best seats to watch me perform and would go very early to the covered courts, where the Veladas were staged. While my mom would record the rehearsals and dance performances on her cell phone, she also relied on Lola Lina to record me. After the pandemic, when there was a three-year pause in the Pasinaya, Lola Lina even hired a professional photographer. She was especially excited in 2023 and 2024 because I had the opportunity to join the Bel Air Annual Fashion Show. For both years, I got to wear the designs of Norman Peñaflorida. Lola Lina purchased the clothes I wore so I could keep them as souvenirs from her.
Looking back, I really appreciate Lola Lina being there for me because ever since the pandemic, she didn’t want to leave the house, only if she had to. And so, as she spent countless hours in her wheelchair watching my practices, I realized it wasn’t easy for her. I wish I had thanked her more. I came to understand that this year would be different—and difficult. I felt her absence. I no longer had my number one cheerleader and ‘stage mom’. Still, the show had to go on. Last year, when my Ninang Mylene visited from Vancouver, she found herself alone in the house, since my Lola and most of her kasambahay had gone to the rehearsals. She saw for herself how devoted Lola Lina was. Ninang Mylene told me, “Lola Lina loves, loves, loves you, Caroline!” and how Lola was very determined to be with me during rehearsal week.
I think Lola Lina would be happy that, for this year’s Pasinaya—entitled ‘Sumayaw Sumunod’—I truly enjoyed myself. I remember when I was having one of the dress rehearsals, my mom brought SPAM sandwiches for our merienda, just as Lola Lina used to do. While we were eating, we toasted to Lola. This year, my mom agreed to join the Annual Fashion Show, knowing that Lola Lina would have been excited. Mom said that ordinarily, she wouldn’t have joined, but she did so because Lola would have been thrilled. Since my mom was nervous, I reminded her to just have fun and smile—the same advice Lola Lina gave me the first time I joined the Fashion Show.
Afterward, Mom and I couldn’t sleep right away, so we chatted about getting our hair and make-up done by professionals, the clothes we wore, and plans to join next year. We also imagined Lola was there in the audience, cheering, and telling us that we are her pride and joy. This past year has been difficult, but I truly believe my Lola is proud of me! And I even have some proof. When Mom looked through Lola Lina’s cell phone recently, she found a message for me with a photo from Fashion Show 2024 that didn’t get sent. The caption read ‘Our Star’.
Message received Lola!
One on One with
Lola Lina
By Daniel Thomas S. Lizares
I would like to share a conversation I had with Lola Lina. This was in the summer of 2023. By then, I had started to go to college fairs and was trying to figure out what college course I would take. Lola gave me advice. She said that in life “the most important is to have an education.” She couldn’t “believe that, in two years, her baby [that’s me] would be graduating high school.”As I write this in 2025, I am off to college in the States where I will be studying kinesiology or sports medicine.
This is Lola’s message to our family about the chat we had. “Guess who surprised me? Someone tall, wearing a dark blue T-shirt, came in waving hello. Even that near, I could not make out it was Tom Tom and I videoed him! He has his future plans, all laid out, and alternatives, which are incredible. He wants sports science, which is not offered here. I said you can come teach at La Salle Araneta [the school her dad, Lolo Badong, founded]. He is also thinking of how he can make the equipment cheaper because right now it’s so expensive. He also has plans to set up a volleyball club, if he can’t make it as a professional volleyball player. There everyone is our flash surprise and thanks Tom Tom for getting to share your ambition with me.”
In the conversation Lola Lina recorded, she also asked “how much is the pay”. She added “you have to live to support yourself because your parents won’t be around for the rest of your life. I had to learn how to work. I had to learn how to save so I could assure a future for you guys right? So that’s what you also have to do because in the end you will have a family.”
But she really stressed “that life isn’t about money, so remember that.” When I was listening again to Lola’s conversation with me, she had some final words:
“You are inspiring by knowing what you want to do for the future. You have a goal, achieve it, work hard…you have lots of guts and wisdom.”
Thank you for your kind words Lola Lina. I will always remember this. You were always so generous with my volleyball training.
Thank you for taking care of my gym membership at Rockwell Atletica, my strength and conditioning sessions at PACE Therapy and volleyball camps at Solid 7.
So that’s why before I leave for my studies in the States,
I had to pay my respects to you.
Across The Miles
By Edward Joseph S. Lizares
When I started college in September 2024, Lola Lina would call me almost daily. I kept her messages she sent through Viber. She wrote:
“God always be with you. Mother Mary, pray for us all and keep Edward loved and respected”. Because we were in different time zones, she would ask
“Hello! Are you waking up or going to sleep Edward? Miss you, love you. At another time, she shared “love you lots and miss you. Sometimes I think, during meals, the door will open and you’re there.” She would also greet me when I wake up:
“Good morning Edward! Have a smiley day! Love you very much! Praying for your good health and safety…hope you had a good sleep.”
One of her last messages referred to a picture of me when I was months old. It was a promise.
“My baby [is] so cute I’ll write another poem tomorrow when I feel you’re right here with me. May you have another night of wondrous dreams. Bring this photo with you and remember this cutie is you! Love, prayers, hugs and kisses.”
Lola Lina may not have gotten to write that poem. What she didn’t realize is that what she wrote, with tenderness, love and care, is poetry.
A Magical Christmas
By Stella Santiago
Christmas 1988 was a truly magical time for our family! My daughter Kathleen was born on November 16th that year making her our special ‘Christmas baby’!
Her arrival right before Christmas was so timely and especially comforting for my mom because earlier in the year my grandmother, Lola Vic, passed away. In a way, Kathleen became the perfect distraction for my mom because now she had a granddaughter to dote on.
When I look back on that Christmas, my memories are filled with a warm glow of a time when my sisters and I were all living in my parents’ home on Cypress Street.
My mom and dad, my sister Danielle and my Tita Digna all flew to Vancouver from Manila and my sister Mylene flew in from Paris. The house was a full house and we were all living under one roof. It was so perfect and it even snowed! We had our White Christmas that we always dreamed of.
We cooked together, had all our meals together, watched tv in my parents’ room with all of us in my parents’ bed. The house was bustling with activity -- we decorated the house, danced and sang in the den, went tobogganing and played in the snow with my four-year- old son Timmy; we just did everything together!
My mom, the writer and poet that she is, wrote a poem for Kathleen that Christmas which she would sing to her like a jingle. To this day,
I can still hear my mom singing that song
Lina and the Legend of Lady Godiva
By Mylene Santiago Brioux
1980 in Vancouver began quite unexpectedly and unusually with the arrival of Lady Godiva, bareback and bare feet, on a white horse and in our own front yard! And this undeniably became the best tribute to our first home here on 2371 West King Edward Avenue. I recently came across a small note that my Mom had written, which anchored a memory to a time long ago, when she had gotten a phone call that she had just won second prize in an Eaton’s contest.
So as the caller was explaining, my mom must have scribbled these very words, “Lady Godiva, 2 o’clock, LIVE, Press”. Which meant that Lady Godiva, was coming over to deliver 12 boxes of Godiva chocolates, herself!
Eaton’s Department Store often had these extravagant promotions. Once, it was a search for a real diamond in a mound of shimmering crystals. After that, it was a raffle to promote Godiva Chocolates. And I vividly remember my dad taking us in our red Datsun station wagon to Eaton’s to try our luck once again.
So that eventful New Year’s Day, our friends and family,including Lolo Salvador and Lola Vic, Tita Reg and Tito Rick, waited excitedly for the legend to arrive.
My dad noticed that our house had that perfect location for Lady Godiva’s grand entrance! He explained because we lived down a hill, what better way for the star to descend upon us than by starting at the top of our busy street.
Suddenly, it seemed the whole of Vancouver was waiting with us to celebrate our victory.
We all watched in amazement as my mom responded so confidently to the press. She was also a STAR! Later, she gave a box of Godivas to them and to the actress as a gesture of gratitude. I cannot remember what the first prize was? But winning the second prize was definitely unique and uniting for all!
That night, our whole family watched my mom’s interview on CBC evening news. Needless to say, my dad taped it on our much-loved Betamax cassette recorder. And even after the holidays, my teacher Madame Gudmanseth said she had seen my mom on tv!
How I wish I knew where that recording is today!
Lola Lina and Me
By Kathleen S. Jayme
My Lola Lina was the best Lola I could have ever wished for. She and my Lolo Dan supported all of our dreams and they gave us the world.
My Lola Lina was not just the most wonderful grandmother but also an activist, environmentalist, artist, historian, writer, poet, songwriter and singer.
I am so lucky that she left behind such a rich body of work which I will always treasure. As a filmmaker, I am reminded that it is through art that our stories can live on forever.
My Lola Lina was incredibly excited about me following Naomi Osaka’s journey as she competed in Grand Slams around the world. “My Lola was my biggest fan!”
(Photo Courtesy Efren Landaos on behalf of Tubi)
Kathleen with Naomi Osaka
the night of the premiere for her next film, “Naomi Osaka The Second Set”
Click to play video
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Kiss You In My Dreams
by Kathleen Jayme
Christmas in Cypress
By Lina Santiago
THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS
By Lina Santiago
Santa did not come swiftly
He’s added bulges to our stomachs,
wrapping papers on the floor,
bills to pay tomorrow for presents
and food we ate.
We’ve been shopping
till our purse is almost empty.
Because Christmas is not just for us,
it’s for our loved ones
and for those who help lighten
the burden of our chores
It’s for the children who are sick,
the homeless roaming the streets.
It’s for the needy and the lonely
We add them to our list!
Christmas is for forgiving
Quite a tough thing to do
It’s a time to pray
For without Jesus, Mary and Joseph and that
first Christmas morn where would we be?
No singing and rejoicing
No song of love and cheer
No Christmas Day
No children joining the angels
in their Gloria Alleluia!
Hope you’ve enjoyed the 25th
The celebration and good cheer
You brought for Baby Jesus gifts
The Magi did not get to bring
for they were only looking
for the King of Kings
Merry Christmas !
Till next year,
May we all come together and sing
Maligayang Pasko
at Manigong Bagong Taon.
Lina Santiago
2023
CHRISTMAS MEMORIES
By Lina Santiago
It’s past Christmas
waiting for the New Year
Thoughts of my children
visiting me
Thoughts of my dear ones
just a buzz away
Waiting to be with me
at the end of each day!
Will talk about school,
our hopes and dreams
Our visits to Disneyland
and places we’ve been
Thoughts of summer
never missing winter and spring
in our home in Cypress,
Vancouver, B.C.
Back from my wandering
waiting for midnight
When fireworks exploding
jolt us from bed
We have gone to church earlier
to thank the Lord
for His mercy and grace
in the year past
We kneel down in prayer
once more to plea
for His mercy and blessing
for the New Year!
We don’t need balloons
so our spirits are raised
Just a prayer
whispering Lord
I trust in you
In joy and in pain
My comfort be!!!
Lina Santiago
2023
EnJoy the Crossword
By Edward & Daniel Lizares
An open letter to our Bishops
By Danielle Marie S Lizares
Mom always let her opinion be known. With the flood control controversy, I thought what would Mom say.
The CBCP has encouraged the faithful to wear white on Sundays. As Cardinal Pablo Virgilio David remarked, in a recent letter, white is a symbol of purity and it is this purity that is sadly lacking in our society. Since the flood control project controversy, there has been an urgent call for transparency, accountability and good governance.
It is here where I would like to propose the CBCP take steps to create a Truth and Justice Commission similar to South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission, which in 1995 was tasked to investigate human rights violations during the apartheid era. It allowed victims to share their stories and for the perpetrators, who were granted amnesty, a chance to confess their abuses.
How our nation can benefit from a similar commission. It will allow for those have committed plunder to admit to their crimes and acknowledge their wrongdoing. They will be required to return the ill-gotten billions. For elected officials, who have been accused of violating their oaths of office, they will need to promise that they will no longer run for public office. For DPWH employees, they can be given a chance to do the work they were hired to do and to ensure that ghost projects never happen again.
Our country needs to turn over a new leaf. We keep on saying “tama na, sobra na”’ and nothing concrete has ever happened. The masterminds, who are caught red-handed with their hands in the coffers, just disappear only to reappear from self-exile when our collective memory forgets.
As Nelson Mandela said “ a better future depends on all of us lending a hand, your hand, my hand.” The CBCP can lead us by the hand and can use its influence over our government to have this commission so we can really achieve Truth and Justice.
Danielle Marie S. Lizares
...from Mom
You are my baby love - always. Prayers for health, happiness, good fortune, peace, and joy. Always, love God and our Blessed Mother. God Bless. Mama Mary, I entrust Caro to you and your son, Jesus.
Lola Lina
October 20, 2024
Click to play video
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I'll Be Home for Christmas!
Sung by Lina Santiago
